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From the desk of Coach James

The simple easy fix to overcoming anguish.

Do you ever set out to do something, and no matter how hard you try, the thing you are trying to do doesn’t go to plan? When this type of scenario ensues, if you’re anything like me, you try a little bit harder, put in more effort, and swear – a lot. This is what happened to me when I recently decided to redesign my website. In my head I had an idea, but executing my vision onto the screen got a little frustrating at times. Does this sound at all familiar to you? Keep reading to learn how I did something remarkably simple to rectify my extreme anguish.

All our struggles in life are there to teach us something, we’re often too stressed to take notice of the lesson that we’re going through. I tried multiple times to get the graphics just so, the colours and fonts all the same, but for whatever reason it just was not happening. I rang website technical support, and that led to little resolution. For the next few days I proceeded to procrastinate trying to please my aesthetically keen eye, but to no avail. This continued for a few more days to the point of rising blood pressure.

I stopped myself in that instant of frustrated anger, and did something simple yet remarkably easy, with outstanding results. Asking myself, what can I do to resolve this situation so I can get on to doing other things? As Tony Robbins teaches, ask a good question, get a good answer. Ask a lousy question, get a lousy response. I then proceeded to ask myself another question: Does this (the font colour) really matter right now, is my writing still able to be read? The answer was, yes, people are still able to read my writing, regardless if it’s brown rather than black. So, does it matter; is it worth getting stressed over? No! So, let it go, and move on. What a novel solution to a problem that only existed in my head.

This taught me a lesson, providing me with something to take with me into the future, the question, “Does it matter?” Byron Katie teaches in her work, about asking yourself the question, “Is that true?” That’s a very useful question to ask yourself in times of despair, or if you tell yourself something like, “Nobody loves me.” Often, we make things appear worse than they actually are, in our heads. Next time you get angry, frustrated, or start procrastinating, stop and ask yourself a helpful question, such as: Is that true? Is this helpful? Does it matter? Is anyone going to die because of this? If the answer is no, then let it go, move on, or ask yourself a subsequent better question, something like: How can I better deal with this situation right now?

I hope you found this article helpful? If so, please comment below, like, and share this to help others. For life coaching, or further information please visit Many thanks.

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